My international man of mystery

IMG_6015My partner and I just completed a meeting with our friend who is marrying us, discussing details of our rapidly approaching wedding ceremony. When I began having visions of our wedding back in the Fall, there were a couple of things that were crystal clear about it. The first was that it would take place on 3/24/18– five years after our first date. The second was that our dear friend who introduced us would be the one who married us, because in my partner’s words: “this is all his fault.”

I first met my soon-to-be husband six years ago on a random day in February. I was at my studio around midday. I wasn’t in a session, but sitting at the front desk, when the studio door opened and in walked my friend with a handsome and mysterious stranger. The stranger had a blue bandana on his head and a scruffy face. The second he stepped into my space my eyes were riveted to him– and alarm bells in my head began sounding loudly. My friend sauntered in casually, stranger in tow, as if midday stop-ins were something he did all the time. (In actuality he had never before stopped by my studio unannounced). He introduced the stranger, giving absolutely no context for who he was or what he was doing there.

We stood in the entrance to my studio talking for several minutes. To be honest I have absolutely no idea how much time passed– it could have been five minutes, it could have been forty five. All I know is that I was singularly focused on this human being who had just walked into my sphere from out of nowhere with absolutely no warning. And he was having a profound affect on my entire nervous system. I found myself talking to my friend about I-have-no-idea-what while Mr. Mysterious talked to my friend and colleague who was also in the the studio at the time. I was aware of the tenor of his voice as it rose and fell in conversation and I felt literally drawn magnetically towards him. It was all I could do to resist the force of the attraction, and I’m still unclear on how I was able to maintain a conversation. The details are blurry, the gestalt is what is crystal clear.

At some point conversations wrapped up and my friend and Mystery man left the building. I IMMEDIATELY texted my friend: “Who IS he?” (As in, give me some context for this handsome stranger, please.) His response was “He’s an international man of mystery.” EYE ROLL. Really??

That evening I decided that we needed to take some of my daughter’s dresses over to my friend’s new baby– Mr. Mystery’s god-daughter and the reason for his visit. I was determined that I would see this beautiful, magnetic man as much as possible in the indeterminate amount of time that he was in our fair city. I packed up a bunch of baby clothes and my two children, who were 5 and 9 at the time and headed over to our friend’s house for a “casual drop in” just like the one my friend had staged earlier. (Again, this “drop in” was unprecedented.) I soaked up as much as I could of Mr. handsome while my children ran wild around my friends’ living room– a joyful representation of what these new parents had to look forward to.

I managed to see Mr. International again the next night at a party. (I completely arranged this– it was not random.) This was probably more social interaction than I had had in months– I was a single mom and a complete introvert. It was during the party that I casually arranged for us to do a bodywork trade while he was in Portland. BOOM.

I worked on him first. Putting my hands on his body was intense. He was completely stalwart throughout the session– saying next to nothing and maintaining complete external composure. But I felt his internal energetic monologue and it was far from composed. There was a storm brewing just beneath the surface of this mysterious man which despite his best efforts he could not hide from me. I made him a flower essence at the end of the session, sitting right next to the table and again I felt his gravitational pull tugging on me. I wanted to settle into him. (I realized this was inappropriate and resisted). He worked on me the next day. His hands were firm and strong and somehow familiar. I fell into an ease with him that was unlike anything I had experienced before.

We talked a bit about his plans and where he was headed next– ultimately back to Thailand. And then he was gone. We exchanged emails a couple of times over the next year and chatted over the computer. I read his blog and was immediately turned off by the grammatical and spelling errors. (curse of an English major). And then a year later I received an e-mail that he had moved into town and he wondered if I wanted to start up a bodywork trade.

ALARM BELLS!!!!!!!!!!!!

When he first reached out to me I was in the midst of a long-distance whirlwind romance with an old flame from high school. I remember thinking– what? now? Mr. Mystery? “WHY ARE YOU TOYING WITH ME UNIVERSE??” And then my old flame abruptly ended our long distance affair. I saw Mr. Handsome for a couple of trades and then decided what the hell and asked him out on a date. My kids were away for Spring break in California with their dad– and I realized I had nothing to lose.

On 3/24/13 Mr. Mystery and I hit the town and painted it red. The days and weeks and years to follow have been a consistent process of building and strengthening a massive foundation of trust, friendship and love. He did not walk easily down this path in the beginning– for years he fought me– but some things are worth fighting for. “Consistency over a period of time” is how he first defined love for me– and that’s how we have ultimately defined this relationship. It is consistent and it continues to stand the test of time. Whatever comes our way I know he’s got my back as no one else ever has or will.

15 days from now I’m marrying an International Man of Mystery…

And I can hardly wait.

 

 

before I head to the land of matrimony…

It’s 17 days now till the BIG EVENT.

Having the dress drama sorted at least to the point of understanding there is a dress to procure, I find myself turning my focus to the ceremonial aspects of the approaching nuptials. Yesterday I found myself humming a song that I hadn’t heard in years while I was teaching– the melody wouldn’t leave my head. I got home with the song still turning circles in my mind and finally found the song and played it. I realized as soon as I heard the first few notes that it was the processional for our ceremony. Check another detail off the list. BOOM.

I’m an interesting human being– difficult to precisely categorize. I’m incredibly detail oriented, but also operate much like a hurricane or tornado while in the midst of a creative process or project. I run in several different directions at all times. You could call me easily distracted, but I’m also capable of intense focus. I’m not much of a planner but I actually have an aptitude for creating very detailed order and structure. Hard to pin me down exactly. I’d say I have a very non-linear method of planning which would probably make anyone trying to plan this wedding (or anything) with me slightly crazy. Luckily– I’m heading up this one person committee, with my partner cheering from the sidelines and my daughter assisting when necessary. We seem to be going gangbusters.

The thing that is most present in my mind over the last day or so is the importance of calling together all of my womenfolk before the ceremony. I’m not really much of a “bachelorette” kind of girl. I’m not a big drinker and I don’t feel the need to go out and sew my wild oats. They’ve been sewn several times over. I’m a homebody. I feel happiest in my house, surrounded by the people I love. HOWEVER, I am about to get MARRIED, for REALS and I need to amass my women in some form before setting off into the forest for my nuptials on March 24th. As I began to sit with the idea of doing something with my women beforehand– what I was most struck by was the IMMENSE power of all of the women in my life and how amazing it would be to call them all together ceremoniously to give me their blessings before I head to the land of matrimony.

As much as I might like to play it cool and act like this wedding isn’t a big deal– that is completely untrue. It is a HUGE deal. Getting married to the man who is sleeping six inches away from me as I write this (yes, we’re living in sin– but only for 17 more days) is a MASSIVE acknowledgement. I have known quite honestly since the moment I laid eyes on him six years ago that our souls were intertwined in such a way that defied logic or explanation. But rather than get swept up in emotions or intangible intuitions, (that would never fly with him anyway) we have built a massive, sturdy foundation rooted in consistency, friendship, kindness, consideration and love. We have walked through fire and brimstone to get to the place where we stand now– and I am a witchy, witchy woman. I am going to CEREMONIALIZE the crap out of this event. So, all the more reason I need a super dose of magic from my ladies beforehand.

As my visions of the blessingway have been coming through what I am most struck by is the number of incredible women I have had the privilege to have come into contact with over the eleven years I’ve been residing in Portland. Each time I think about it, more of them pop into my mind, and I realize I can’t possibly miss the opportunity of calling them all together and harnessing their energy and love towards blessing the acknowledgement of this union. So– the blessingway IS HAPPENING!! I just texted a friend tonight to enlist her help in turning my visions into a tangible reality. She is DOWN. For those of you who don’t live in Portland and would like to join us remotely (yes, that is a VERY REAL thing)– it will be happening on Thursday, March 22nd at 9 pm pst. But you can send your blessings WHENEVER you like!

We are always open to receive!!!